Grand Canyon

15th June 2012

Woke up with first light at 4.30am and dragged our sleepy arses out of bed and onto our new pushbikes. Determined to see the sun rise, we threw a few things into backpacks and headed off. Unfortunately the Grand Canyon park people haven't grasped the idea of providing good bike signage so we got a little lost and didn't quite make it to the rim in time. Still, we saw the sun just as it topped the ridge and got to watch the canyon filling with colour.

It is rather grand.

You can't really describe the sense of immensity, the distance is so great that your eyes tend to flatten out the perspective. It's pretty freaky looking down, though, especially near some of the unfenced steep drops. I had a few attacks of the heebie geebies in places.

We stood on Mather Point, the most popular lookout here, and watched the sun come up, along with a swarm of japanese tourists. They went away after a while so we had a bit more space, were able to do the obligatory National Lampoon's Vacation “look”.

After that we decided to ride to the Kaibob Trailhead and hike down a short way. We didn't have a big water bottle or sunscreen but we had muesli bars and the sun wasn't very high anyway because it was about 5.30am. Also, they provide water at the trailhead, which is nice.

Our new bikes from Walmart were fairly rickety and I had to put up with the horrible narrow seat that came with it (could only put one cheek on it at a time) but they did well enough. The ride along the rim is quite spectacular and all paved so lots of fun.

The altitude here is pretty high – 2100m above sea level. As we discovered, you get puffed really quickly and it's harder to ride or walk. So we took it relatively easy.

Halfway along we came upon a small flock of deer. They weren't shy and didn't flinch when we hurtled up to them. Took some video, carried on. Also saw numerous tiny squirrels. And one very angry Swedish woman who was berating her partner as they walked along the track.

Got to the trailhead, drank far too much water and started down into the canyon. The trail had a lot of switchbacks at the start and was gravelly in places so you had to watch your footing. Also had a lot of mule poo. The view was spectacular and got better once we got to Ooh Aah Point, our destination. Took lots of photos, watched a squirrel, got a bit of vertigo and generally enoyed it. We headed back up when the number of people walking down increased. Wasn't too bad a climb, got back at about 9.15am. Cycled back to the RV with a short stop at the visitor centre. The whole place is very spread out and built up, able to cater to the millions of people that come here. Shuttle buses drive you around the place, lots of parking, shops and restaurants. Just outside the park there's a major town with McDonalds and Imax theatres.

Mather Campground where we're staying is fairly dusty with a lot of pine trees but rather pleasant. Very busy, of course and you are camping right next to people. We had to move the truck from one spot to the next because I couldn't get a consecutive booking. No problem though.

Luke did the washing, I went to bed and had a very large nap during the heat of the day.

We lazed around in the afternoon and decided to have dinner before heading off to look at the sunset. This was probably a mistake as we were a bit late in getting away and naturally became instantly lost on the non-marked bike tracks. We had intended to ride out to Hopi Point but the road involved a massive hill that was pretty hard going in the high altitude.  By the time we made it to a viewpoint the sun was almost gone. Very pretty, of course. We were looking down on Bright Angel Trail, the first path into the canyon, originally forged by the Indians. In the 1920s it was privately owned until the National Parks wrestled it off the bloke who was charging $1 per visitor. The trail runs along a major fault line that bisects the valley.

We both agreed that we'd like to try the hike down to the river. But you have to book a year in advance and be well prepared for it. One day.

Shark Tank Waterslide

14th June 2012

Golden Nugget hotel: Woke early, psyched for the shark tank. Alas, it didn't open until 10am. We consoled ourselves with a breakfast in the smokey cafe and went out to look at the shark tank. The pool deck is massive, covered with recliners and even has several gambling tables. I noticed a brochure at the side of one that said “When the fun is over”. Curious, I went over to read what it had to say, only vaguely aware of an incredibly nasal voice saying “Maam! Maam! Maam!” Turns out the duck-voiced staff member guarding the pool didn't want me near the closed tables. Or -more likely - the casino will go to great lengths to stop you from reading info about not gambling.

Chastised, we went back to our room to do a bit of Facebooking and report on our wedding. Unfortunately intenet was $12 at the hotel so we thought we'd use our unlocked Telstra modem.

We got as far as opening FB before suddenly we went offline. Luke checked things and noticed that we had $0 credit. He rang Telstra and discovered that they charged $15 a mb (not what the Telstra shop people in Gympie had said) and the bill was now $128 for 8mb. I think I managed to get one George Takai pic for that.

Thankfully they agreed to waive the bill and we now know not to use our Australian Telstra modem here.

After that little disaster it was time to go swimming.

Went straight up to the top of the slide and swung into the tube. The waterslide descends 3 stories and a clear section shoots straight through the middle of the massive aquarium, filled with tuna, groper and several massive sharks. We were keen to see the sharks as we went through. Unfortunately, the laws of physics conspired against us. The larger the mass, the faster we went down the slide. The sharks were just a bluey grey blur lasting half a second before we were spat out into the pull with a wedgie and a nose full of pool water.

Brilliant.

We did the slide four times, would have probably repeated the experience more but the queue was getting  bigger each time we climbed the stairs and I'd forgotten to put sunscreen on. It was so hot we were almost dry by the time we got to the slide again.

Luke managed to sit up on the last go and slow himself down with his feet so he got a look. We also made friends with a little girl who was having her first go, her grandpa was very nervous about her doing it. We let her cut in front... and so she promptly threw herself in straight after another kid, even though the lifeguard normally makes you wait until the person in front is in the pool (checking via a video camera). She survived with a big grin to show for it.

We only had an hour and a half in the pool, then it was time to leave. The Golden Nugget was pretty crass (awful piped music, smoke, no Rv parking, dreadful décor and less-than-friendly staff) but the pool made it all worthwhile.

We did the hot, slow walk back to Main Street Station where we'd parked, took our pirate costumes back (after giving some serious consideration to just keeping them) and then headed east. A bit of grocery shopping delayed us, though, as we stopped at Walmart to find more supplies. American food is rather perplexing. All the cheese is orange (there's no camembert!!), the “cereal” aisle consists entirely of Froot Loop clones and everything has high fructose corn syrup in it.

Finally set off. Headed over the Hoover Dam bridge despite strong advisories against high profile vehicles using it due to strong winds. I panicked but Luke was fine.

The trip to the Grand Canyon was 450km or so, a long drive. We travelled across Arizona, steadily climbing the whole way. The landscape went from creosote desert like the mojave to greener uplands, still pretty arid. Saw some flat topped mesas although we're not quite in the right area for that. It was fairly scenic but didn't change much. Looked like Armidale country.

We didn't stop except to rescue the fridge which swung open. We took one small detour into Williams, the town before the Grand Canyon. It is a tourist mecca, lots of restaurants and hotels. Thanks to getting a bit lost, we ended up on Route 66 – for one block. We had to turn around because it was closed off due to a horse festival or something.

The sun was setting as we turned north and travelled the last 80km to the Canyon. Unfortunately we were too late for the sunset so our first look at it was in the near-dark. Not much to see, I admit. Also, cold! Bit of a shock after the 40 degree heat of vegas.

Had French lunch for dinner, very pleasant, and then collapsed into bed.

*Note: I didn't take the above image (it's from here). Our photos from this part of the trip were wiped by the dodgy 65gig card :(

Elvis Wedding Day

Las Vegas June 13, 2012

Another hot day, 35 degrees at 8.20am. After a shower in the RV park (even the bathrooms are air conditioned) I walked up to the Golden Nugget and got us checked in early. Our next job was to secure pirate costumes.

Williams Costume store was something of a drag queen's wonderland. So many sequins, feathers, glittery things and crazy dress-ups. The costume hire section was amazing, I wanted to stay and play all day. So, it seems, does everyone else, which is why they only let you try on a maximum of three costumes. It's perhaps a good thing that sizing meant we didn't have a huge choice. I only tried on two pirate wench costumes and I went with the first one, the green wenchy raider costume. The second one fitted better but was itchier and more matronly. Luke's Captain Hook outfit was spectacular. The hat didn't quite work but we improvised and bought an extra feather.

Quality costumes aren't cheap... the whole thing cost us $170 plus $200 deposit. We had to go to an ATM around the block to stock up on cash. Luckily the machine only gave out $20 notes. So Luke was withdrawing hundreds of dollars, with people queued up behind him, in a dodgy Las Vegas neighbourhood. Makes you feel good to be alive.

Costumes secured, we were all ready for a swim in the shark tank pool at the Golden Nugget. Unfortunately it took a long time to get the RV parked. The hotel didn't have a space, the Plaza wanted $20 so we ended up back with our good friends Main St Station, three blocks away. Still cost $10 to park. The security guard, with gun on hip, knocked on the door of the parking lot and asked what we were doing there. He didn't want us sleeping in the vehicle. He was happy once we explained things and he said he'd make sure no one stole our bikes.

Before long it was time to get dressed and then, resplendent in our costumes, we took a taxi to the Graceland Wedding Chapel.

It wasn't a huge place. We crammed into the "staging area" office, handed over far too much money, my online friend Holly and her family arrived and then bam, we were in the tiny chapel with it's dovey stained glass windows. Before we were psyched the doors had closed and Elvis was there, in a pale blue jumpsuit. He really did look and sound like Elvis. The video guy was lined up ready and so it was on. Elvis walked me up the aisle singing "I Can't Help Falling In Love With You."

And suddenly I was all choked up. It was such a silly thing we were doing but right at that moment I got rather emotional and thought about when we first got married 17 years ago. So I was trying not to cry.

It was a very short sort of thing, very funny, also rather sweet. Elvis was great and Luke was lovely and Holly cried. I nearly cried but held it in, thankfully. We said our special "Elvis Vows" which were hilarious. The whole thing ended with a rendition of "Viva Las Vegas. And then suddenly our guests got ushered out a side door onto the street, we were posing for photos, meanwhile the DVD was burned and it was all over. So we effectively blew $500 in 15 minutes but it was SO worth it.

After that we went to the restaurant Holly had chosen. With us were Holly's son Spud, Spud's Dad Clifton and his wife (both of them were from Jamaica). The food was upmarket Mexican, very nice. We looked out of place in our pirate costumes but the waiters were amused and gave Luke a free drink.

Here's a huge thanks to Holly who shouted us dinner at our "reception". It was great to have someone with us on our crazy special day.

After that we headed back to the hotel and made waves as we walked through the corridors and casino. Lots of people said "Yarr" at us and laughed. It was fun being a sideshow so we decided we'd wear our costumes out onto the Fremont Street Experience, which is a pedestrian mall given over to bright lights and entertainment. The funny thing is that the whole area is peppered with people dressed up, posing for photos - for a fee. So people looked at us but avoided us.

We were tourist attractions in the hotel. A whole tour group of Brazilians wanted to take our photos and so we posed for photos with them. Which was hilarious.

We strolled up and down Fremont St, looked at the neon signs. I had wanted a drink but the bars were smokey and noisy. At 9pm all the casino lights shut down and the arching LED roof over the street became a Bon Jovi concert. Everyone stopped and looked up and enjoyed the show. Amazing sense of shared experience. Everyone cheered a the end.

We eventually went back to our room and sadly took off our costumes. We went and drank hot chocolate by the pool, looking at the shark tank.

Like all the Casinos in Las Vegas, smoking is allowed indoors. They do a fairly good job of filtering the air but by the end of the night we were both sick of the smell and our clothes stank.


All in all, a good wedding day. We should do this more often.
(Note: We can't get the photos off the SD card for some reason so we're going to be lacking in pics for a bit.)

Qantas Flight 107, All Expenses Spared

Right. So we're in LA and we're completely knackered. We've had a short nap of 2 hours sleep after being awake for 24 hours... now we're trying to stay awake until it gets dark here.

The most important thing is that we're alive. Thanks to Qantas and its dodgy maintenance work, this is something I'm especially grateful for. More on that in a bit.

Our big trip started at 3am in the pouring rain on Sunday 10th when the limo arrived.. We thought it was worth an extra $35 to get a limo instead of risking a taxi at 3am on a public holiday. The driver was all dressed up and helped us pack stuff in the pouring rain before whisking us off in the super-clean Statesman. We felt very special and rock-star-ish. In a jiiffy we were at Brisbane international, arriving three hours before our flight like we're supposed to.

There was nobody there.

Well, nobody except the cleaners and the three backpackers that had opted to save money and just sleep at the airport. And us.

Check in didn't open until 4.30am. Security didn't open until 5am. Lucky we got there early (and paid for a limo!).

We were waiting at the bag drop when two familiar faces strolled up  - Toni and Phil Powell, who originally started Gympie's Hearr of Gold Festival. They were off on a six week USA adventure like us, making a documentary on the philosophy of gratefulness. By co-incidence they also booked the same flight home as us. So suddenly we had a couple of travelling companions and had a good chat over coffee.

The first leg was so promising. A Qantas 747-400 that had been newly refurbished. It was so shiny that the crew seemed to be distracted by its fabulousness. Their announcements were the vaguest I've heard.

"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. We'd... er... we'd like to... er.." Silence. "The seatbelt sign... has been er... so... er..."

Our seats were in the middle, there were two empty seats beside us. The entertainment system was so swish and had more movies than you could poke an ipad at. I started the trip by listening to Elvis (seemed appropriate) and then set about going through Status Quo's Greatest Hits to see if all of their songs really do sound the same.

Yes, yes they do. ( But they're still brilliant.)

We had to change planes at Sydney and we filled the waiting time with a quick shower and felt great.

LA, here we come.

I think I'm going to go out on a limb and say that the 2nd leg was the Worst. Flight. Ever.

Qantas no longer lets you choose your seats unless you pay them a $20 fee. So we were at the mercy of the seating fairy. And this time around there wasn't much mercy to be had.

We got put in a set of three seats right down the back. Every single seat on the plane was taken. And those seats  must be the crappliest ones I've ever sat in. Bar Jetstar. Never mind the fabulous 747 we had from Brisbane. Now we were crammed into what could be the oldest 747 in the fleet. Tiny screens, clunky computer things taking up foot space, the seats smelled like urine, Luke's seat was broken, my headrest was buggered, the American next to me at the window seat couldn't get his TV to work at all.

All that would have been fine except for the almost 2 hour delay where we sat, crammed into that goddam plane, going absolutely nowhere. It turned out that they had a problem with a fuel gauge. Then they discoverd they didn't have enough fuel for the flight. THEN they discovered that there were issues with the refuelling valves so a whole mainenance team swung into action. While we sat there. For two hours.

I was fervently hoping they'd give it up as a bad joke and let us get on the A380 like they'd promised me in the ads. No dice. Which didn't make me feel very confident. If you've had a problem with a fuel line... do you really want to fly that thing 11,000km?

At least they discovered it on the ground.

It took another 15 minutes to take off due to delays. Even then I thought they were going to abandon the flight when we sat on the tarmac and nothing happened. I thought I was getting good with flying but that was not a pleasant takeoff. I really did expect something awful to happen.

Throughout the flight people's reading lights kept flickering on and off. Then we had a major bit of turbulance over the Pacific that had us strapped in for an hour (and Luke got pretty airsick).

Finally, finally, after 13 hours (plus 2 on the ground) the plane touched down safely at LAX and we taxied to the gate. We were waiting to be towed in when the whole plane just shut down. Lights, air conditioning, everything. Dead silent. The attended came on and said:

"Oh, well, it seems we've had a complete shutdown of the electrical system. I'll... er... we'll just crank that over and get it back up again for you."

I am very grateful that happened on the ground.

And I'm now feeling very nervous about the trip home. I really, REALLY hope we get a new plane. And  I don't think I'll be flying Qantas anytime soon.after this.

So anyway, here we are in LAX, staying at an airport hotel and doing nothing much until tomorrow. We walked to the chain diner Denny's and I ordered $2 pancakes, couldn't finished them, so much food. Luke's pancakes had icing on them. Because maple syrup and sweet cream and strawberries are not enough. The waiter didn't look happy when we asked him how much we should tip. Will try not to do that next time. This tipping thing is going to take some getting used to.

* Update: It turns out that our horror flight was the very last one that plane did. It was apparently decommissioned straight after. And thank the sky fairies, we got a new 747 on the way back.

So. This will be our travel blog for the grand USA Trip, June-July 2012.

We're calling it "This Is Bat Country" after the line from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Vegas will be one of our first stops and we'll be travelling through bat country in our rental RV to get there. I'll be pouring beer on my chest to facilitate the tanning process.

Will try and add posts when I get time and internet access.